


Work Overload of DOOM

by Ultimate_Nerd_Lady



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: M/M, Working on schoolwork, ZADF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-04-17
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:01:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23693551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ultimate_Nerd_Lady/pseuds/Ultimate_Nerd_Lady
Summary: Zim is pushing himself too hard, and Skoodge takes it upon himself to snap him out of it.
Relationships: Almighty Tallest Purple/Almighty Tallest Red, Invader Skoodge/Zim
Comments: 2
Kudos: 30





	Work Overload of DOOM

“GIR! Give me back my wig! I can’t go to the filthy human skool without it!”

Skoodge was sitting criss-crossed on the floor as Zim chased around the little robot. Of course, unlike the stature of the irken soldier, every move Zim made was big and bolsterous.

“You gotta kiss me goodbye first!” Gir insisted, metal legs clanking across the ground. 

“Don’t be ridiculous! I would never do that!” Zim caught up to Gir and snatched the wig from his head. “Skoodge, make sure he doesn’t do anything that compromises us while I’m out at skool. Got it?”

“Of course…” Skoodge kept criss-crossed as Zim stormed away, a slightly dejected Gir joining Skoodge.

“I worry about that boy sometimes.”

Skoodge was about to inquire, but Girs eyes flew to the tv remote and quickly went for it, immediately turning on a round of Floopsy Bloops Shmoopsy and laughing like a maniac. Whatever he was thinking seemed to have already slipped his mind.

So all in all, the day had a typical start.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You’re too late to stop me Dib-monster! Soon, all the earths cereal will be mine, and the only way for me to give it back will be if the humans make me their supreme overlord!”

“You’ll never get away with this Zim!”

“Master, can I get a frog?”

“You can try to stop me, but it’ll be futile. Skoodge! Pull the lever Skoodge!”

“Uh… this one?” Skoodge pulled the lever. The machine proceeded to produce a comically sized boxing glove heading straight for Zim.

“Wrong lever!” Zim yelled as the boxing glove punched him across the room.

“Why do you even have that lever?” Dib questioned.

“Oh you can’t possibly comprehend my complex reasonings for installing that lever!” Zim shouted while he barely managed to get on his feet and rub his face “Skoodge! Tell him why I installed that lever!”

“Is it to make the other lever not work? Because it’s not working no matter how much I pull it.” Skoodge replied as he pulled the lever up and down multiple times.

“What?! That can’t be!” Zim ran over- and past, probably still dizzy from the boxing glove punch, before turning back and running to the machine to inspect it. “No! My conquest! Nooooooooooooooooo!”

“... Well. I guess we’re kinda wrapping up early Zim.” Dib shrugged.

“I still wanna frog!” Gir shouted.

“I worked weeks on this invention! It was going to help me take over the humans! Where did I go wrong?!”

“Okay, I’m just gonna leave.” Dib turned around and started walking out.

“Can you help me find a frog Mary?”

“Well my afternoon plan of stopping Zim is kind of shot at this point…”

The casual conversation between boy and robot continued as Zim shouted irken profanities and banged his head against the machine causing a lot more damage to his cranium than the boxing glove would even hope to cause.

So it was once again, a typical day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Skoodge saw Zim come up the elevator the next morning, he was covered in grease and soot.

“I don’t understand! I should be in possession of all the cereals right now! Where did the machine go wrong- GIR GIVE ME MY WIG!”

Gir was once again running around the house wearing the wig.

“You’re up here kind of later than usual.” Skoodge observed as Zim was giving chase.

“Well of course! I’ve been working on fixing the machine! But I’m interrupted because I have to go to the skool and-“

“Why don’t you just skip it?”

“... eh?”

“It’s obviously hard to juggle right now. So why don’t you skip it?”

“I can’t skip it! What kind of invader would I be then!” He shouted snatching the wig and holding Gir off with his foot “No Gir I’m not kissing you! And where did you get that frog?”

“I kinda don’t expect that attitude from you.” Skoodge remarked.

“Well you should! My one focus is the mission! Now! To skool!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zim hadn’t always talked like that. He was incredibly sure of himself, without having any accomplishments under his belt. He believed in his value more than anyone. Now it was always an accomplishment that kept him afloat. He had to make sure everything he did was an accomplishment. It was hardly the same person. 

So, when Zim came in, muttering about an assignment for skool that would take a week, Skoodge expected him not to care. But…

“Computer. Tell me all there is to know about polar bears.”

At this point it had become typical.

~~~~~~~~~~

Work on the polar bears project was only overshadowed by work on the machine. From home to work on the project, to work on the machine with all the usual energy and passion, but even that was wearing down. His morning chase of Gir for his wig started taking longer since his movements were no longer as dramatic, which meant he was later for skool, so he stayed later, and spent more time working.

Any suggestion of Zim to relax and take a break was met with yelling and scowls that were the embodiment of the saying “If looks could kill.” One thing was always true of Zim: he was stubborn as all fuck.

“My report to the tallest!” Zim shouted one day in the middle of his polar bear report, tossing the papers in the air “Skoodge make sure the live polar bear downstairs doesn’t break out of containment! I’m going to call the tallest!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On the massive, the two tallests, Red and Purple were in the process of making out on top of the dashboard.

“My tallest, you’re knocking over some important documents…” the navigator noted. That lead to Purple looking the navigator in the eye and purposely swiping at the pile of papers on the desk and knocking them to the ground.

“Those are your orders of donuts…” the navigator commented.

“Well, pick them up! We’re trying to-“

“My tallest! We have an incoming transmission for Zim!”

The two of them made disdainful groaning noises.

“Well, don’t just stand there. Get it over with.” Red muttered getting up and straightening himself.

The screen alighted with Zim who was covered in grease and soot, and his wig still on him, but hanging slightly down on his face.

“My tallest! I have had some major setbacks in my latest plan to conquer the humans. But I am working through them!”

“That’s great Zim.” Red said “Thank you for your update and see you next ti-“

“The skool has been rough! And I’ve been wearing my wig to keep Gir from taking it! Impressive is it not?”

“How is that impressive?” Purple asked, earning an elbowing from Red.

“... Eh?” 

“Never mind, I think we’re breaking up!” Red shouted, making signals at the comms officer to cut the transmission. He took the hint and the screen went black.

“Now, where were we?” Red asked floating back towards Purple.

“Eh. I kinda think the moods ruined.” Purple shrugged floating away.

He was gonna kick his ass.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Not impressive? How is that possible?” Zim asked pacing back and forth, “I’ve been working so hard! But… I haven’t… actually finished anything have I?” He questioned “No! How can that be? I have to work harder! Harder than life itself!”

Hoo boy. Skoodge’s incessant need to eavesdrop seemed to tell him things were worse than he thought. This might call for desperate measures.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“It’s hard to pin down the exact location of the abominable snowman, but I know for a fact he lives in Antarctica Gaz!”

“Isn’t your project supposed to be on polar bears?”

“Just a moment! Think about the implications! Think about-“

_ Ding dong! _

_ “ _ I’ll get it! Dib burst from the couch and landed in front of the door opening up to see-

“Hi. Listen, I know we don’t-“

Dib slammed the door and turned around.

_ Ding dong! _

“I’ll get it.” Gaz pushed Dib out of the way and opened the door for Skoodge to come in.

“Gaz! Why did you do that?!”

“To piss you off.” She answered “I’m gonna get a soda.”

Dib watched her leave, then glared at Skoodge.

“What are you here for? Zim sent you to steal my secrets? Burn down my house? Oh, are you here to destroy the evidence I-“

“You have that same polar bear project as Zim right?” Skoodge asked.

“... What?”

“I was thinking you could work with him! Get it done together! Take a load off his back.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” Dib put up his hands and waved them back and forth “Why would I work with Zim? He’s my sworn enemy!”

“Because I assume you haven’t gotten far in this project and also need to step up your game in order to have a good grade and having a person to work with and help you would actually be a great idea?”

“... Nuh-uh.” Dib replied lamely.

~~~~~~~

“Hey Zim… I bought someone to help with the polar bear thing.”

“Eh?” Zim looked up “A polar bear expert? That’s perfect! I can drain all the polar bear knowledge from their mind and give it to myself so I can-“

He then noticed Dib.

“ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?!”

“Yeah, I’m just gonna take a few pictures and leave…” Dib turned around and began marching out, but Skoodge caught him by the coat.

“Come on Zim. You’re obviously not doing well on your own. All Dib wants is to help.”

“No I don’t.” Dib said snapping several photos. 

“... Dib could use help.”

“And why would I help him?”

Skoodge was slowly running out of ideas. 

“Uh…”

“MASTER!” Gir ran up to Zim clinging to his leg “I want a kiss!”

“No Gir! Ugh!” Zim tried shaking him off.

“Zim, why are you so resistant to people trying to help you?!” Skoodge snapped.

“... Eh?”

“You’re always like this! Trying to do things all by yourself, because, I don’t know, you think the work is more authentic if you do it on your own, but that’s completely not true! There is no more value to accomplishing something without help or healthy habits than there is with those things! You need a helping hand sometimes. It’s okay to ask for help. You’re not a burden.”

“Murder is okay.” Gir chimed.

“Your feelings matter.” Skoodge tried to ignore Girs comment, and focused on Zim “And right now, I think you’re feeling tired doing this on your own. So just accept some people trying to do things because they care for you.”

Zim looked at Gir smiling up at him with a comprehensive expression.

“I suppose… there has been cases where I… could have some boosts to my greatness.”

“Yeah. Take Gir for example. He’s just trying to love you. Right Gir?”

“I still want a kiss.”

Zim made a reviling look and his eyes went to Skoodge who nodded. He made a few more frustrated noises and quickly kissed Gir on the forehead. 

“Thanks master!” Gir wrapped him in a hug, which Zim made a few frustrated but affectionate groans at. Then Gir snatched his wig off and started running.

“Huh? Gir!”

“Thanks Zims evil robot!” Dib shouted, taking snapshots of Zim.

“Hey, you’re kind of ruining the mood of the speech I gave.” Skoodge told the human child.

“What speech? I wasn’t listening.”

“Oh… I put a lot of thought into that speech, can I say it again?”

“DIB!”

“So I said ‘Zim why are you resisting-‘ wait was it that or ‘why are you so resistant’? Um…”

Suddenly, Zim was chasing Dib throughout the house with the same big movements he always had.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Once Zim had Dib floating in a tube of liquified Cheezos to study the effect on humans, he was making up a list. 

“Why do I have to do this again?”

“Well I read somewhere that creating a schedule helps you manage your time and feel more relaxed!”

“Sounds stupid!”

“Are you telling me your race doesn’t even make schedules for things?” Dib questioned “How have you managed to conquer so many planets?”

“Question us again Dib-worm and I will change the experiment from regular Cheezos to flaming hot Cheezos!” Zim shouted.

“Well we do have scheduling on irk, but not everyone engages due to not having the executive functioning-“

“Skoodge! Stop talking! You’re giving the human our weaknesses!”

“Oh. Didn’t notice.”

“Yes…” Zim slid up to the tank “The human has many tricks and treachery. Isn’t that right Dib?”

Dib just lowered his eyelids in an annoyed look.

“So, I have an idea for how this schedule will play out.” Zim turned and marched back to Skoodge “Skool, then polar bears, then the machine.”

“Okay… and where do breaks go?” Skoodge asked.

“Breaks for what?”

“I dunno. Snacks? Maybe eat some of those Cheezos instead of wasting them on experiments. No offense Dib.”

“None taken. Please let me go home.”

“Excuse me Skoodge?!” Zim shouted “These experiments are important!”

“Okay, but shipments of supplies don’t always come often. What did you order for your last ration?”

“Um…”

Skoodge looked around and just started noticing all the fun dip wrappers on the floor.

“Did you waste all this months rations on keeping your energy up for working on the cereal machine?”

“... What about it?”

“Well, okay, we need to set aside a schedule for your eating habits too…”

“Doesn’t your species eat nothing but junk food?” Dib questioned.

“No, we eat snacks.” Skoodge informed him “Like nachos. Or donuts. Or Cheezos.”

“SKOODGE!”

“Right, right, don’t give weaknesses to the enemy.” He sighed “But okay. We have a set amount of snacks and a set time for eating them every day, and then maybe… watch TV?”

“That filth Gir engages in?”

“Well, maybe you don’t like Girs shows but how about something else. Dib?”

“Oh! You should watch Mysterious Mysteries! I take a lot of inspiration from it as a paranormal investigator, and lots of notes and I usually spend time watching- why am I telling you this?”

“Alright that sounds interesting! What channel is it on Dib?”

“No! I’m not telling you that! You’re my sworn enemy!”

“Okay… but see Zim?! There are other shows! And other activities! We just gotta make room for them!”

“Yeesh, you sound so lazy Skoodge.”

“I was the first invader to conquer a planet. Blorch. Remember?”

Zim sat there with a pouty look.

“Okay fine. Put a few of those ‘breaks’ on the schedule.”

“Okay! The first one can be an hour from now! Until then, you’re nearly finished with the polar bear project! Why not finish up? With Dib!”

“I’m not gonna work with him when he’s experimenting on me!” Dib yelled.

“Okay, point taken. Uh… Zim? Can you let him go?”

“NEVER! He’s my enemy!” Zim yelled “And he shall rot in this experiment!”

“I’ll give you what channel Mysterious Mysteries is on?” Dib offered.

“What’s a ‘channel’?”

“Do you… do you not know how to change the channel?”

“... Maybe.”

“Okay, I’ll teach you how to change the channel any time you want IF you let me go home after this.”

“Done.”

Zim drained the Cheetos tank and let Dib out… the latter of the two immediately started bolting towards the exit.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I can’t believe I still have to help you, while handcuffed to your couch.” Dib whined.

“Silence Dib-worm! Anyways, here’s my progress on the project!” He took out a ball shaped device which projected a hologram, of a polar bear going about its business. Dib would never say this out loud to Zim, but it looked totally awesome. “I’ve managed to animate many of this ‘polar bears’ activities, as a demonstration. Of course, doing so is a hard activity as I need to get the precise actions down-“

“Why don’t you just write something?” Dib asked.

“... Eh?”

“Write. Like with PowerPoint. You know what PowerPoint is, right?”

“Oh, I do!” Skoodge raised his hand “I’ve ehehe… tried getting a job for myself, so I used it to create my resume.”

“Show me your powerpoints…” Zim demanded.

“I can’t. I’m stuck to your couch.”

“Well, I can show mine!” Skoodge said “Watch this!”

A projector began whirring and the two classmates were hit with a hot pink background with lime green text.

“Skoodge!” A loud announcers voice shouted before an extremely obnoxious transition took them to the next slide “He has work as a soldier! And survived rat infested lands for several months! Whoa!” There was another transition. “And what’s this? He’s skilled with survival tactics and music! Give it up for Skoodge!”

There was a loud cheering noise and the presentation ended with a polite clapping from Gir.

“So, what do you guys think?” Skoodge asked. 

“I love it…” Zim whispered. That had to mean something. Zim NEVER whispered.

“Wow really? Cause it’s kind of a work in progress and-“

“I SHALL MAKE THIS ‘POWERPOINT’ PRESENTATION! Dib! Help me!”

What choice did he have? He was chained to the couch.

“Alright, just give me my laptop so I can work with you.”

Zim ended up spending time with Skoodge obsessing over transitions and fonts rather than making their presentation. But on the bright side, Zim had clearly done his research. Dib mostly copied what he was saying down onto his page without the Zim flourishes. Also on the bright side: Zims reliance on transitions and colors meant Ms Bitters would probably stamp him with a big fat F.

“Oh, I read online about how ice caps are melting!” Skoodge commented “Maybe there can be a slide on that?”

“Actually, they’re no longer melting.” Dib corrected “My dad put a stop to that. As well as all global warming. But thanks for the idea for a history slide!”

“Oh! Cool! Let me look that up!” 

Dib continues on his work while Zim leaned on Skoodge to investigate his findings.

“So this… internut. What’s it for?”

“Well, it’s a pretty easy way to learn about things.”

“PSHAW! Invaders don’t need to rely on the ways of some puny- oooh what does that say?”

Zim on the internet. That sounded like a slippery slope. Eh, deal with it when you’re not handcuffed doing homework.

“Hmph! I’ve used the humans information gathering tools against them!” Zim chuckled “Bow before Zim!”

Dib used his free hand to punch Zim in the face.

“OW! HEY!”

“Okay, break time!” Skoodge came between them “Dib, you said you’d teach him how to use the remote?”

“Oh yeah.” Dib muttered “Here.”

He handed out a basic tutorial, but Zim STILL insisted on watching Floopsy-Bloops-Shmoopsy, and complaining about it so that was that. 

“You know what? I feel good!” Zim sat up after the end of the episode “So I’m gonna work on the cereal machine. Feeling good this time!”

“Okay!” Skoodge followed him in a friendly way. 5 minutes later Dib heard an explosion and screaming.

“Does this mean I can go home now?”


End file.
